Fantasy Football from The Fantasy Addicts

Fantasy Football Preview: Week 3

“I will not allow you to lecture me about the merits of emotion.” (Spock…Star Trek 2009).  This week you should do away with your weak human emotions and start thinking more logically, like me.

Fantasy football: the final frontier.  These are the continuing voyages of my fantasy football teams.  Their ongoing mission: to explore strange new leagues, to seek out new waiver wire acquistions; to boldly go where no fantasy team has gone before…this year’s championship!

1 O’Clock games

Washington @ Detroit…One human emotion is sadness, and that is exactly how you will feel if you watch this game.  Now let’s put that aside and try to determine which fantasy players will excel in this one, using logic.  Detroit is giving up 134.5 rushing yards per game so start Portis.  He was limited in Wednesday’s practice with an ankle injury.  Continue to monitor reports, although it doesn’t seem serious enough to keep him out of the game.  Also keep in mind Washington did not score a TD against the Rams last week so I would not start anyone else on this team other than Chris Cooley.  He has the team’s only receiving TD so far this year and leads the team with 151 yards through the 1st 2 games.  The Redskins allowed Steven Jackson to gain over 100 yards rushing last week so start Kevin Smith.  Another reason is that he’s their 2nd leading receiver behind Calvin Johnson, a must start every week.

Green Bay @ St. Louis…Surprise is another emotion.  The Packers have to be feeling a bit surprised after they lost to Cincinnati last week in Lambeau.  The Rams were surprised that they almost won a game, as were a lot of people in my survivor pool who picked against them last week.  The Rams are giving up 146 rushing yards per game.  Start Ryan Grant.  The Rams are also near the bottom of the league in passing yards allowed.  Start Aaron Rodgers and Greg Jennings.  Jennings put up a donut last week so look for Rodgers to target him early and often in this one.  For that reason I would sit Donald Driver.  I know it’s the Rams, but that doesn’t mean everyone for the Pack will have a big day.  As I mentioned earlier, Steven Jackson hit the century mark last week and somebody has to get yards for them, right?  Start Jackson.  Sit all other Rams.

San Francisco @ Minnesota…Everyone should be excited about this one.  The unstoppable force (Adrian Peterson) vs. the immovable object (Patrick Willis).  We’ll get back to that.  First, allow me to share my emotions on Frank Gore’s performance last week.  Disgust comes to mind.  My opponent had Frank and Chris Johnson going against me in the perfect storm of shitty events.  Needless to say, I lost.    But now I have to put emotion aside, channel my inner vulcan, and logically break this one down.  Minnesota is allowing 109 rushing yards per game, which is a little surprising for them.  The lack of a reliable downfield threat should mean the Vikings will focus their attention on Gore.  If you drafted him then you are probably going to start him this week, but I don’t see him having a big day.  I dropped ’sweet’ Shaun Hill as McNabb’s replacement because he did nothing against Seattle.  I expect the same in week 3 which leads me to conclude that you should sit all ‘9-ers.  Adrian Peterson is going to have his work cut out for him trying to get by Patrick Willis.  I don’t expect Peterson to have a huge day because San Fran is giving up just 53 rushing yards per game.  However, I see him crossing the goal line atleast once and maybe twice in this one.  Brett hasn’t posted any big fantasy numbers so far this year and that trend will continue in this one.  Percy Harvin is Minny’s baking soda, meaning there are so many different ways to use him.  The question is should you use him in your lineup?  I say no.  He has 2 TD’s but only 77 receiving yards so far this year.  So you are really just hoping that he crosses the goal line and I don’t like those odds.

This is what I looked like when Frank Gore and Chris Johnson were playing Sunday.

Atlanta @ New England…Fear is the emotion to notice in this one.  Everyone seems to fear that Brady and his bunch have lost their mojo.  I don’t falcon think so!  Brady is going to work over that young Falcons secondary.  Brent Grimes, Chris Houston, Thomas DeCoud and Erick Coleman.  That’s the Falcons starting secondary unit.  The only name I recognize is Erick Coleman.  If John Abraham isn’t in Brady’s face all day then expect a big day from Captain America.  So who will he be throwing to?  Randy Moss of course.  Randy was shutdown last week by Darrelle Revis; the same man who shutdown Andre Johnson in week 1.  And we all saw what Andre was able to do last week against the Titans.  No Revis means that Randy will be dandy once again.  Wes Welker is still a question mark with a knee injury.  Monitor reports and if he is able to go, then start him.  Welker is Brady’s slot machine and usually hits the jackpot when he’s on the field.  Sit all NE RB’s.  For Atlanta you have to start ’Burner’ Turner.  The Pats have been stout against the run (103 yards per game) but the Falcons will be leaning on their star back extra heavy in an attempt to keep Brady and co. off the field.  For that reason you should sit Matt Ryan and Roddy White.  T-Gonz is their leading receiver with 144 yards and 2 TD’s.  Start him every week.

Tennessee @ NY Jets…If the Titans were playing defense this year like they did last year, then I could see this game ending in regulation with a 0-0 tie.  The J-E-T-S have not allowed an offensive TD this year!  And it’s not like they haven’t played a good offense yet.  Houston and New England can both put points on the board in a hurry.  Chris Johnson may have destroyed me last week, but he will get shutdown Sunday.  Mark my words.  And no, revenge is not a factor in me saying that because I am void of all emotion, I’m thinking logically.  The Jets will continue their stingy ways.  Sit all Titans!  Speaking of the Titans, this is f*cked up!

“We were not intending to be distasteful, and we apologize if we offended anyone.”  –Kings Island Amusement Park

As for the Jets, sit Thomas Jones because you cannot run on Tennessee.  Their pass defense is dead last through 2 weeks but their run defense is 2nd only to the Ravens.  Sit Leon Washington as well.  Cotchery should have a good game in this one.  He had 90 yards week 1 and 87 week 2.  The only other player I would start in this one would be Dustin Keller, the Jets TE.  Sanchez has shown poise beyond his years so far, but he hasn’t posted great fantasy numbers.  Don’t expect him to in this one either.  It’s going to be a low scoring game, so sit ‘dirty’ Sanchez.

Dirty Sanchez, Stinky Hitler and Filthy Fernando…which is your preference?

Kansas City @ Philadelphia…The Chiefs did not look good in losing to Oakland last week.  Philly’s D was shredded by the Saints.  So what to make of this one?  Philly’s D is better than they played last week.  The strength of their defense seems to be in the secondary.  For that reason sit Matt Cassel.  Start Larry Johnson?  No.  He’s averaging just 2.8 yards a carry, has no scores and is facing a defense with something to prove.  Dwayne Bowe already has 2 scores this year but less than 100 receiving yards.  I don’t think he scores in this one so sit him too.  The Iggles have 4 QB’s on the roster.  McNabb will not play in this one.  I don’t know what the reports say right now but Andy Reid is not going to risk him against the Chiefs.  They can win with the guy I picked up this week…Kevin ‘corn on the’ Kolb.  He threw for 391 yards and 2 TD’s last week.  Vick will see his first real action this week also, but I don’t expect him to take away too many of Kolb’s attempts.  Jeff Garcia is irrelevant right now.  Ok, I’ve established that I like Kolb in this game, but who will he be throwing to?  Brent ‘Magnum PI’ Celek.  The Iggles TE had 8 catches for 104 yards last week.  That’s telling me that he and Kolb have a chemistry.  That’s funny, because I don’t remember Magnum PI having a partner.  Anyway, DeSean Jackson is banged up but I just read reports that he was a full participant at practice Friday.  If he goes, start him.  Westbrook is also banged up and I’m going with the McNabb theory for B-West too.  Why risk your star players against the Chiefs.  I say he sits and the rookie-LeSean McCoy-puts up good numbers in his place.

If Tom Selleck was Magnum PI, then Brent Celek should be Magnum TE.

NY Giants @ Tampa Bay…Reports are that Plaxico Burress received a rough welcome in jail…

And he thought Cowboys fans were nasty. Plaxico Burress got a zero’s welcome behind bars at Rikers Island, including taunts of “a – - hole!” and “The Giants suck!” according to jail guards.   ”He was depressed,” said one guard from Rikers, where the former Giants superstar spent his first-ever night behind bars. “He was trying to keep to himself, but everyone was yelling at him.” “These people got nothing,” a second guard explained of the taunts. “What else are they gonna do?”   – SI.com

I think it’s safe to say the taunts of “a – - hole” were in reference to what the inmates wanted from Plaxico.  And “The Giants suck!” was referring to what Plax could do for the inmates.

For the G-men this week start Eli Manning.  The Bucs defense is ranked 2nd to last in yards allowed.  Brandon Jacobs has gotten off to a slow start but that will change this week.  Mario Manningham says his sore shoulder is not an issue.  I believe him and I’m starting him this week as my flex.  I don’t have Steve Smith on any of my teams, but if I did I would probably start him too.  For the Tampa Bay ‘Butt Pirates’-sorry Plax, I couldn’t help myself-sit Leftwich.  He’s facing a Giants D that is giving up just 157 passing yards a game.  They held Romo to 127 yards and pressured him into throwing 3 INT’s last week.  However, the G-Men have been soft against the run.  Cadillac is on the injury report this week so Derrick Ward will see an increased workload as well as good fantasy numbers.

Cleveland @ Baltimore…Cleveland has 1 offensive TD in its last 8 games.  Where was my logic when I drafted Braylon Edwards in 2 leagues?  Anyway, I’m holding out hope that he gets it together this week because the Ravens D has been getting torched through the air.  So I’m starting Braylon, but just in 1 league.  That shows you how much faith I have in him.  The Ravens D is, however, #1 against the run; yielding just 41 yards a game.  Jamal Lewis is out this week so don’t expect James Davis or Jerome Harrison to have any impact.  The Browns’ D has been surprisingly good against the pass.  I’m betting this is more due to the fact that they’re giving up 205 yards a game on the ground.  Why pass on Mangini’s D when you can run all over it?  Start Ray Rice and McGahee this week.  Without the need to pass I don’t see Flacco posting big numbers.  Todd Heap is definitely a threat to score in the red zone, so start him if you don’t have a better option at TE.

Jacksonville @ Houston…Houston is dead last against the run.  Start Mo-Jo.  Houston is not that great against the pass either, but who do you like from the Jacksonville aerial assault?  Nobody?  Me either.  Jacksonville is solid against the run but as easy as a $20 hooker to pass on.  Start Matt Shaub, Andre the Johnson and Owen Daniels.  Sit Slaton.

4 O’Clock games

New Orleans @ Buffalo…For those of you who saw the latest Star Trek movie, Drew Brees is like red matter, everyone is trying to get him and he’s extremely potent.  And just like the red matter, he’s going to open some holes of his own in the Bills secondary on Sunday.  Buffalo is next to last in pass defense giving up 332 yards a game.  The only question is who will he be throwing to?  Bell and Moore will miss the game.  Colston has been his favorite target with 11 catches and 3 TD’s.  Start Colston, Devery Henderson-who leads the team in receiving yards-and Reggie Bush.  With Bell out and Pierre Thomas still not at 100%, Bush should get more touches.  The Saints D is giving up just 56 rushing yards a game.  I don’t think their run defense is as good as the numbers suggest.  They haved scored early and often which is forcing their opponents to throw the ball in an attempt to keep pace.  If Dick Jauron was smart he would run, run, run the ball to keep Brees on the sideline, but he’s not.  I still like Fred Jackson to have a decent fantasy day in this one.  He’s Buffalo’s leading receiver with 11 catches.  After the Bills get down by 2 or 3 scores, they’ll be forced to pass.  For that reason Trent Edwards will also put up numbers and I expect TO to finally have a break out game Sunday.

Chicago @ Seattle…The Seahawks run D was gashed last week and that trend will continue.  Forte should have a monster game.  With the Bears leaning more towards their run game, sit Jay Cutler in this one.  He’s done a good job of spreading the ball around to various receivers, so it’s hard to predict which one will have the better game.  Johnny Knox-ville is their leading receiver so far, but don’t be surprised if he has a mediocre day.  Seneca Wallace gets the start with Hasselbeck out so don’t expect much from the Seahawks’ passing game.  If the 1st 2 weeks were any indication, then the Bears’ D is back.  They will smother Julius Jones like gravy on biscuits so sit him if you have him.

Miami @ San Diego…Where is Shawn Merriman and the Chargers’ D?  He should imagine Chad Pennington is Tila Tequila and choke the shit out of him!  He needs to visualize and attack, just like Adam Sandler in Waterboy.  Now back to logic.  Ronnie Brown should have a solid fantasy day.  Ted Ginn Jr had a breakout performance last week and look for him to do the same in this one.  Start any others Dolphins at your own risk.  LT has been ruled out and although Miami gives up just 64 rushing yards a game, I actually would start Sproles because of his ability to catch out of the backfield.  Peyton Manning showed us on Monday night that the Dolphins D is susceptible to the pass so start Rivers-and his new favorite target-Vincent Jackson.  If you drafted Gates then you got him early which means you’re going to start him every week.

Merriman needs to find his tackling fuel.

Pittsburgh @ Cincinnati…The Bengals have been solid against the run and the Steelers have had no success running the ball.  Sit Willie Parker.  Big Ben will have a decent fantasy day.  Start him if you like 225 yards and a TD or 2.  San-antonio Holmes had a bad case of the dropsies in Chicago but he will rebound against Cincy.  He’s likely to be Big Ben’s main target so sit Hines Ward.  Nobody runs against Pitt.  Sit Cedric Benson.  Carson Palmer will match Roethlisberger’s numbers but he’ll have 3+ turnovers to go with it.  With Chris Henry out look for Ocho Cinco to have a big day.

Denver @ Oakland…Oakland’s run D is giving up 125 yards a game.  Denver is rushing for 130 yards a game.  I think Knowshon will get 80-100 of those yards and a TD.  Kyle Orton will manage the game well but he won’t do enough to warrant a fantasy start.  Losing Cutler has definitely had a negative effect on Brandon Marshall’s numbers.  Combine that with the fact that he’s facing one of the best cornerbacks in the league in Nnamdi Asomugha-if you don’t believe me check out his commercial-and it should be a long day for Marshall.  Denver is giving up 70 yards on the ground per game and 183 passing.  Oakland is 29th in total offense.  Denver’s D is quietly 2nd overall.  Do the math.  Sit all Raiders.

Sunday night game

Indianapolis @ Arizona…Indy has trouble stopping the run, but ‘Zona is no rushing power.  The Cardinals also have 2 backs sharing carries.  What to do?  I would recommend starting Hightower in your flex position but sit Beanie Wells, who fumbled twice last week.  Indy’s D is great against the pass.  ‘Zona has one of most dangerous passing attacks in the league.  Something has to give.  Kurt Warner set an NFL record for accuracy last week so I expect him to have the hot hand again.  Start Kurt Warner and his two big playmakers, Fitzgerald and Boldin.  The Cards have yet to face a good passing team.  Peyton Manning should have good numbers in a game I expect to be an old fashioned shoot-out between 2 old gunslingers.  Start the law firm of Manning, Wayne and Clark in this one.  The Cards D did-however-hold Gore and MoJo in check so you should sit Joseph Addai.

From left to right:  The Bad (Peyton Manning), The Good (Kurt Warner) and The Ugly (Matt Leinart).  Note:  I have Kurt Warner on 1 of my fantasy teams.

Monday night game

Carolina @ Dallas…The Cowboys are ranked 23rd in defensive rushing yards allowed.  Start DeAngelo Williams.  The Cowboys pass D hasn’t been much better.  At the same time Delhomme has been terrible.  Don’t expect much of the Panthers passing attack other than from Steve Smith.  He should have a good game under the bright lights of Monday Night Football.  The Guiness Book of World Records will be making a special visit to Cowboys stadium Monday night and Romo is being criticized by former Dallas great Tony Dorsett.  Neither has anything to do with fantasy football.  The Panthers D is 27th against the run and 3rd in pass defense.  With Barber injured I expect Felix Jones to have a huge game.  I don’t see Romo posting big numbers as far as passing yards but I expect him to throw a score or 2.  And just to quiet the critics he will be turnover free Monday night.  Witten is a must start every week but I don’t like any Cowboy receivers in this one.

Team D/ST…The following are Team Defenses/Special Teams that I would start this week…Redskins, Packers, Vikings, Titans, Jets, Eagles, Ravens, Bears, Steelers and Broncos.

Survivor Pick…Baltimore over Cleveland.  If you’ve already used the Ravens, then go with Green Bay over St. Louis.  Logic would suggest taking Washington over Detroit but the Redskins inability to score against St. Louis last week suggests otherwise.  Chicago over Seattle is also a good pick for week 3.

Logical upset prediction…Miami over San Diego.

May all your fantasy teams live long and prosper.  Unless, of course, you are playing against me.  Then I will be forced to apply the Vulcan Death Grip…